Evolution Can't Be True Because I Don't Like Bananas: My Ponderings on Mr. Darwin's Flawed Theory

(NOTE: This book is satirical-comedy -- however, there are underlying truths somewhat concealed within one of its chapters, that may be discerned by some observant readers!) Book Description: INTRODUCTION Here again, I will be gracing another major subject with my irreproachable wisdom and my brain-flipping intelligence, in this 4,630 word book. I doubt that there is a single evolutionist who can match wits with me because I am a student of life and of nature. In this masterpiece book, I express my differences regarding Mr. Charles Darwin's “Theory of Evolution”. I will not write about the detailed studies of cells and proteins that biologists, histologists or cytologists study and I will not write about ancient bones that scientists of anthropology, archeology or forensics study. No, I will stay with the more important aspects of 'what evolution claims', as opposed to the anti-evolution stance, which is of course, the correct one. How can I be sure that my stance of non-evolution beliefs is correct – one might ask? The answer is -- because I am Percyvelle Pennington the Third and my views contain no fallacies but are beacons of the truth and they cannot be faulted by even the most intelligent people from the evolution-theorist camp. I hereby grant you permission to proceed! DISCLAIMER: My written materials are not designed to contribute to any negative evolutionary changes to your physical body. TABLE OF CONTENTS CHAPTER 1: The Importance of Bananas and Monkeys Among Evolutionists CHAPTER 2: The Theory of Evolution Makes Money for Scientists CHAPTER 3: My Interview with Bigfoot (“I'm Not a Missing Link” He Says!) CHAPTER 4: If We're Animals We Shouldn't Have Morals In Conclusion ________________________________________ **The History Behind these Comedy/Satire Books: While my largest base of book titles are on health disorder subjects, I also have a significant number of business-related titles published, as well as many on Christian Bible theology. Some people may believe that an author who writes on serious subjects, should not write comedy books because this can discredit them to an extent. Why would this be the case? Should readers rather believe that serious subject writers like myself, who write on subjects such as Christian faith, cannot display the very human trait of a sense of humor? On another point I would mention that with these short humor books, I am also throwing the comedy at controversial subjects, which helps to quell the negative rhetoric they often produce (i.e. exaggerated male and female stereotypes, reviewer and author wars and evolution versus creationism). With them being so different from my serious subject books, I assigned a pen name to them as well, being “Percyvelle Pennington the Third” (also one via pen name: "Fredrick Doyle Wimberley"). He seems more like the guy who wrote them, than I do. Percy is a snide type guy and he is arrogant; traits that I hopefully never display in real life! He does make his points known in his memoirs but in strangely comical ways. A “cheerful heart is a good medicine” according to the Holy Bible, and “laughter is the best medicine” according to Reader's Digest. My thoughts were, that if I could take a few serious or controversial subjects via my compiled articles and create a little comedy from them that makes people smile or laugh, it would be something worth publishing. With the debates going on within these subjects, between people expressing the pros and cons of them, it is my hope that I can lighten the rhetoric a bit by injecting some humor into them. These booklets ARE NOT intended to offend anyone and if you'll notice, I make fun of everyone in them, via my alter writing personality -- Percy P. III (and Mr. Wimberley). It is my hope that readers find the medicine of laughter and cheer within the pages of them, so that they can escape the stressors of life for just a little while!